The Christmas thing...

So, after a glass of wine, my mother, a lightweight, wondered where she went wrong with her kids. I reminded her that I was one of her kids and that I was there in the room. And as far as I was concerned, I was pretty good. I mean, I got a nice job at a great school where I get to do lots of neat things. I occasionally donate time to various animal related causes. I have nothing left to prove to myself. I'm satisfied. How's that wrong, I wondered.

"Ah, but my kids they don't... Hell, you're an atheist."

Fuck, I thought we were past this. "Yeah? And I'm fine. I hardly ever kill people. I'm pretty nice."

"But do you believe in God?"

"Well, to be completely accurate, I don't know, but I'm vanishingly certain that there is no evidence for it."

"Do you believe in science?"

"No, science has proven itself to me. It's not like I have to have faith in the same sense that science works. I don't think that 'having faith' is in itself necessarily a positive quality."

"Well, I think it can be, and it depends on the person."

"Then stop haranguing me about being an atheist."

"But what about all the good that religion does? The music is good."

"Well, yeah the music is nice, but that doesn't make what it celebrates true. And the good things, sure, some people do nice things in the name of religion. I do nice things, however, in my own name because they are nice things to do."

"What did it for you?"

"How did I lose faith?"

"I don't know, I think I grew up. What made me realize in no uncertain terms that religion's primary interest was not others but itself was the priest scandal, but I was already on my way out...."

"Yeah, the Church took a big hit there. Lost a lot of people. That's when I decided that the hierarchy is not the church, but the people are."

"Yeah, well, your Church disagrees."

"But the people do lots of good...."

"And the Church takes credit for it."

"What do you mean?" She wasn't having it.

"I mean that I hang out with a lot of really nice people, most of them atheists."

"And I'm sure that they are nice people."

Ignoring what was should have been a given, I continued, "The Church has nothing to do with the fact that they are nice, and that I can get along with people everywhere. The Church swoops in, takes credit for people being nice to each other, and people shrug and say, sure. I don't get that. The golden rule is not some sort of mystical truth. It seems to be par for the course. I just don't feel the need to take credit for it like the Church does."

Then we had lunch.

HJ