Camille is such a biaaatch!

I have no idea who Camille is. But that hasn't stopped a bunch of fans of what can only be a rotten show, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (I've never seen it, but I've never heard the term "Real Housewives" used in a way that was not interchangeable with "gutterfolk," so I'll roll with it), from posting on HJHOP. They found me because I recently posted about Allison DuBois, the fake psychic who humiliated herself on that show a week ago. Seriously, the fans of the show seem to think that just because I have no comment filter they should deface my website with what I'm sure to them appear to be ideas, but which is more akin, as far as I can tell, to some sort of Internet-based dirty protest.

Nonetheless, I am more than happy to look at a couple of the dimwitted comments about psychics that have appeared on my site. For, as the kids say, lulz. A good one came from "Anonymous," though I think that is a pseudonym:

I think her little stint on Housewives was career suicide. Not that I ever thought she was a real "psychic" or "medium". I'm furious after seeing that episode.

Ah, very good! A clear-headed skeptic! Huzzah!

A real medium does not possess those qualities that she was exhibiting (regardless whether it was alcohol or not).

Fuck.

With all that negative engery she has...there's no way she can tap into anything.

So, you can tell if someone has energy just by looking at them? Why can't I do that? Actually, this, I think, reveals a lot, if I might theorize for a second (and I damn well might). If you like them, they are psychic. If you do not like them, they are not psychic. It seems to me that this is somehow an extrapolation of confirmation bias, that somehow whether or not you accept what someone says depends on how you feel about them, whether they confirm your idea of what a psychic should be, not whether or not they are actually psychic. And why would a paying customer go to a mean psychic? (All psychics who are not insane, by the way, are mean.)

Especially after her comment she made about knowing when Kyle will die and what would happen to her family......that is just something a real medium would never in a million years say or even think in such a vendictive way.

Why not? Actually, this is true, and perhaps there is some cultural conditioning going on here. I have a hypothesis that people have been conditioned to have really low standards for psychics. Essentially if they say nice things about you or your dead people, then you are happy.

I feel bad for people who pay to see her.

Love and light man. This woman is a fraud.

Love and light? Are you Anna Robles? Here, let me put out some bad vibes~~~~~~~ There!

The next head-bashingly endumbening reply came from Maria, and this is damned painful:

I am going to say this.

"This." There. I said it. I'd say it again.

MY name is Maria I am a Spiritual Medium/Spiritual Advisor. Believe me or not I DONT Care.

That's great, so I can have guilt-free fun at your expense! Whee!

I Have been gifted for 16 years.

Are you sure the word your mom used wasn't "special"? Or do you perhaps mean that you have been passed around like a holiday fruitcake? Or are you both special and a fruitcake. I bet that's it.

Let me go on to tell you guys.

If what's past is prologue, what is it when it's all prologue? Does that mean that you are already done? Funk dat.

I saw the housewives show on thrusday and i picked up on alot about the Allison. I was very much surprised of how she acted. What i saw of her she is a evil person.

Wow. You must be psychic to have read all of the other boneheaded comments.

if she does have these gifts as she says there not from God. Need I SAY MORE?

Your homophones and prepositions are from Belzebub's backside, sweetie. And please don't say anything more. Why don't people who are kissed with the gift by God ever gifted rudimentary punctuation or capitalization skills, as in:

KYLE is not going to be divorcing her hubby or vice versa. I have picked up alot about KYLE and none of Allison said is true.!

Also, Kyle is a guy. Why would he be divorcing some woman's hubby? Or, vice versa, why would someone's husband be divorcing someone named Kyle, who is presumably a man?

I AM Typing all this on my moblie

Heehee. The LORD JEHOVAH is typing. Or I AM WHO AM MISTYPING ON MY MOBILE.

so its hard to explain everything.

That's just the words part, hon. Really, don't feel obliged to continue.

ANYONE WANT FREE READINGS I WILL GIVE YOU GUYS 1 FREE READING ON THE HOUSE! I FEEL everyone needs at least 1 free reading.. email with number @ divineheavenlyangels@hotmail.com

I'm going to do a little psychic experiment here...I'm reaching out into the universe and drawing on the powers of the Big Woozle in the Sky to divine that her name is regal...Lion? Lyons. Her name is Maria Lyons, and she is a transplant to Florida from Texas....I am using my psychic powers to peek into her mind...and...she is from...central, no, south-central Texas, from a very small town in Marina...Medina County--Natalia. So, San Antonio? She was born in...1983...a Taurus. April 25. Last week, her PC crashed and I have a strong psychic feeling that she has been perfectly ignored by...Tori Spelling? Really? Whatevs. Maria is really beautiful, actually, with long dark hair and dark eyes. I know this because I have a picture of her: http://www.divineheavenlyangels.net/resources/marai2.jpg), if I wanted a PI to follow her.

In order to really fuck with someone's brain, all a psychic needs is a phone number or some basic identifying information. You can get a name from that and an address, and then anything that a PI can look up in a LexisNexis database is available to the even the least literate psychic. Your life becomes an open book. I have already, in about 10 minutes, zoomed in on her identity precisely, identified some of her lotion-peddling friends. It would be wrong of me to befriend her on facebook and root about for info that way, and I have a conscience. But, really, who can afford to hire a PI?

Well, Maria can make it worth her while. You can see from her services page that she will not only take lots of money for doing nothing, but will also take more money for doing nothing, accepting donations as well as money for "psychic" services. (There's a reason her sign, Taurus, is that of the "bull".)

For five dollars a day, she will contact your angels. I presume she can promise this because she is holding the angels hostage in her basement and tortures them for information. For $90, she'll cast a prayer spell (or at least tell you she will) on your behalf. For a mere $100 she'll fuck up your memories of your dearly departed. (I don't know why granny needs the $100 on the other side, but I'm sure Maria will get it to her.) If you have 2 hours and $175 that you don't think would be better to give to the James Randi Education Foundation or used on porn or something, she'll teach you how contact your angels. Fuck! They're my angels! Gimme! Or, if you are completely without a clue, she will be your friend for $450 a month. Really. For $450 a month, I sure would have a PI do some digging.

Don't advertise your lame psychic performance art on my site, angel-knickers. I believe that every psychic deserves at least one free warning.

HJ