The Wackosphere reacts to the Prop 8 ruling...

I keep my finger on the thready pulse of the religious right, ever waiting for it to stop. Yet, they keep on ticking. Yesterday, they were bent over and taken roughly from behind by the federal ruling that Proposition 8 was unconstitutional. Today the weeping, regret and self-recrimination begins.

Just kidding. They take responsibility for nothing. But holy shit have they found blame. I've watched the backlash unfold in slow-mo and it is...delicious. You know that scene in the South Park Episode "Scott Tenorman Must Die," where Cartman makes Scott kill and eat his own parents? I fell a little like that as I watch the right freak out over this totally banal non-event:

Yet, they panic. Run screaming, little screaming runners!

Professional bigot (not an ad hominem--a conclusion based on evidence) Bryan Fischer, who has the completely made-up title of "director of issue analysis" at the American Family Association, calmly refers to the ruling as:

tyrannical, abusive, and utterly unconstitutional display of judicial arrogance -- and argues that members of Congress should immediately launch impeachment proceedings against [Judge Vaughn] Walker.

But it gets better:

In a press release yesterday, AFA identifies Walker as a "practicing homosexual" who, for that reason, should have recused himself from this case "because his judgment is clearly compromised by his own sexual proclivity." Fischer concurs.

"It's really no different in our judgment than having a judge who owns a porn studio being asked to issue a ruling on an anti-pornography statute," says the AFA spokesman. "There's a conflict of interest there."

In a response, HJHOP has learned, Walker replied: "Mlffrrch vilffle flililsch," because he had a mouth full of cock.

Yes, he's openly gay. Of course, by your reasoning, no heterosexual should hear this case either, you enfeebled abomination, because it would be like a pedophile running a daycare.

See how stupid you sound? Of course not.

Randy Thomasson, who runs a website shrilly called "savecalifornia.com," says that somehow, by interpreting the constitution, the federal judge has violated his oath. (What's he supposed do all day at the office? Knit?)

Instead, he says Walker has "imposed his biased homosexual agenda" upon the voters, the parents, and the children of California.

Idiot Wendy Wright, truly one of the ignorant creatures ever to prattle on embarrassingly on camera (remember her confrontation with Richard Dawkins?), has the following enlightening things to contribute:

Wright adds that Californians approved the amendment because they understood the sacred nature of marriage and that homosexual activists "use same-sex marriage as a political juggernaut to indoctrinate young children in schools to reject their parents' values and to harass, sue, and punish people who disagree."

This bitch sees conspiracy everywhere (go back and look at her talk with Dawkins). When absolutely EVERYTHING contradicts you beliefs, everything must look like an agenda. (And she does have "cult stare" in that clip, doesn't she?)

The Family Research Council could not do any better:

Peter Sprigg of the Family Research Council FRC) says Wednesday's ruling shows "a real contempt" for the democratic process. "What's really disturbing is that Judge Walker essentially said that the only motivation for this is hostility towards homosexuals as individuals -- and nothing could be further from the truth," states the FRC spokesman.

"We hate them collectively!" Give us an opening, Peter, and gay rights supporters will take it. But you knew that. (Wink wink nudge nudge say no more!)

Man, where would snarky comments about homosexuality be without the Kids in the Hall?

I'm sure there will be more to come!

HJ