This week in conspiracy (7/25)

My wife, an escapee from a convent in Quebec, where she was exposed to all sorts of filthy satanic rituals (although, admittedly, her mother says she never was quite the same after she pencil stuck in her own head), has reminded me that it is time to review the week that was weak.

• Turns out that the Rose Cheramie existed. You know, the one who pops up at the beginning of Oliver Stone's incoherent JFK and then disappears? Whether or not she had any knowledge of the assassination is a completely other matter.
• Duff Gordon--or Gordon Duff--does it really matter: Still crazy after all of these years. A little 9/11 denialism + Mossad agents steering remote control planes into the towers. The man should be in an asylum.
• Just a little slice of turd pie, please. I'm all full: Mel Gibson's wife meets with half-wit Mark Lane. She really surrounds herself with stellar men, doesn't she? Oh, he represented the People's Temple and survived the massacre, apparently. And he's Lindsay Lohan's lawyer. WTF, Mark?
• UFOs in China.
• Utter Nutjob-in-Chief Hugo Chavez digs up remains of Simon Bolivar and has him tested for poison. It was a hell of a week for exhumations, actually, as Romania pulled Nicolae Ceausescu and wife out of the ground to show everyone, that yes, it's really them and they are still there. (I thought they staked him a few years back, so he should still be there! Animala recommends that they cut his head off and burn him, just to be safe.)
• News Alert: Conspiracy theories are everywhere. I only include this because I like the frowny faces on the sign.
• Alex Jones says his youtube account hacked. Yay!
• What is with the Dancing Israelis conspiracy over at Veterans Today? Are they like the Jumping Jews of Jerusalem?
• Elvis is still dead, and you can now bid on the autopsy equipment used on him...including the gloves!
• WorldNetDaily, there's nothing good about it. But I did find one conspiracy theory that they did not bite down hard on....fluoridation.
• See if you can recognize the ad populum in this moon hoax article.
• Alex Jones and Jesse Ventura: Two dim things that go dimmer together!
• I don't have an opinion of the "Journolist conspiracy" yet. It's sad, but I can't find any good, detached discussion of the thing. I'll wait for next week's On the Media to discuss it.
• I liked this conservative's article on whether or not "his type" can ride bikes. Heehee. Karl Rove should totally get his pudgy ass on a bike.
• YOU CAN MEET THE HOTTEST GIRLS--WITH LIVE WEB CAMS!!! Also, something about the North American Union being tied to the oil spill or some such shit. But the girls are the most important thing. Also, did I mention the picture of the boob at the top?
• And now for something completely different:"The UFO people seem to be focusing more on 'living right' than material acquisition." There's nothing goofier than new age UFO assertions. We make up deities to tell us what we want to hear.
• Militia groups, the ever-growing crazy.

Quote of the week:

So...who are the extraterrestrials?

The short answer is that the extraterrestrials are not alien or non-terrestrial...essentially, they are evolved and/or hybrid humans from the future.

Conspiracy Theory of the Week

• Cleopatra and the Virgin Mary are both fictionalized versions of Julius Caesar's daughter Julia. It's a little bit country, a little bit rock 'n' roll, and a whole lot of batshit. Oh, and I think it's Canadian.

HJ