This Week in Conspiracy (6/7/10)

An interesting week for those of us deeply involved in the coming New World Order. I have been informed by my Reptillian leaders that I will be commanding a legion of demons during the Tribulation, which is pretty neat! But enough of that. On to the week that was weak!

Best conspiracy theory of the week? A "network of Sikhs" is trying to take over the governorship of South Carolina. South Carolina, I support your leaving the Union, but only if you take Texas.

• Wow! He looks like what he writes! Subliminal Illuminati takeover? You're soaking in it!
• "Josef Stalin. Our savior!"--Before It's News.
• Media Matters: Rand Paul gives interview to Russia Today (weird-ass anti-American conspiracist state media) instead of Meet the Press.
• Oh, how cute. Can 30% of South Koreans really be completely out to lunch? I have my doubts.
• YOU CAN'T READ THIS ARTICLE! CONSPIRACY?!?!
• World Net Daily: Can you see where they attribute a Ghandi quote to Jane Fonda? (Hint: look where they refer to Jane Fonda.)
• The Dennis Hopper-UFO connection.
• Bilderbirgers meet. Big huge shit given.
• Look at how much cocaine they do at Before It's News! Also, now they don't like communists? Cripes! Pick a conspiracy and stick with it, asshats!
• Turkish conspiracy theory: Why just hate Kurds when you can hate Jews too? Also, notice the entirely responsible use of the word "taints."
• Mysterious celebrity deaths. Boogaboogabooga!
• Mysterious presidential commissions. Boogaboogabooga!
• "Useless Fuck Claims Obama Antichrist!" "There's a sale at Penny's!"
• Did Goldman-Sacks cause the oil-rig explosion? Fuck no. This is going to go the way of the put-options on the airlines before 9/11. A far from unique burp in the noise.
• Ah, more Bilderberg stuff. More level-headed this time.
• Is BP lying about damage in order to hurt Obama? (Seriously, it amazes me what shit the untrained mind can come up with.)
• Almost the best conspiracy theory this week: "It seems like the global elite always likes to well plan things, especially around good numerology dates." Wow. That totally makes my water more hydratious.
• Colin Powell, the oil spill, the military and David Icke. From Krazy Kanada!
• A Conspiracy Con update. Or, ConCon, as I like to think of it.
• Scientists benefit from creating useful vaccine! Dastardliness presumed!
• Hey hey! The Australian Skeptics are mentioned in this article about nutty Australian nutters who are askeered of the weather! Woohoo!
• Oh noes! He' comm de Izlamz!

We'll be back next week. Just you wait.

HJ