This week in conspiracy (28 June 2010)

Yep. The pigs are inside my head man, and they got there through the fluoride, but that's no reason we can have another edition of the week that was weak:

• LOOK OUT! THE COMMUNISTS ARE TAKING OVER AMERICA FOR THE 70TH STRAIGHT YEAR!
• ALSO THE COMMUNISTS ARE TAKING OVER AMERICA FOR THE 70TH STRAIGHT YEAR AND ONE POST MORE!
• "Because it's unicorn soup, sir." (Not really a conspiracy, just a fun article.)
• Apparently security is sort of lax in Kentucky these days. One of them got out.
• Conspiracy theories related to the Guatemalan sinkholes. According Before It's News, the craziest is that it was caused by a combination of an inadequate drainage system and underlying geology. But you don't read this for the run of the mill goof. You read it for the comments.
• Glenn Beck: "I Should Be Fired." Did they ever catch the guy who killed that hooker?
• There's a new player in town, and they suck monkey balls. It's the Centre for Research on Globalization, and they find Jesse Ventura's book not complete twaddle. Not surprised it took 'em this long to read it, honestly.
• P-Diddy, lapdog of the New World Order. Seriously. I could sort of see Lady Gaga being an agent of the Illuminati, but Diddles?
• If you believe 9/11 was an inside job, you're not a "student of conspiracy theories." I'm a student of conspiracy theories. You're an idiot. I can't believe this piss-hole got to perform with Edge.
• Beck and the Birchers.
• Michael Jackson's family: every single one of them has a different conspiracy theory. Their family reunions must be fucked up. And Latoya is useless. I'm just adding that one for me.
• Anderson Cooper: Illuminati Vanderbilt Jew.
• "Blah blah, conspiracy waaaaaah!"
• It's clear that we need to start using a phrase other than "New World Order," because it is only misunderstood.
• No, wait! Israeli environmentalists tipped over the Deepwater Horizon.
• Joseph "Porno" Farrah: Did you see how President Barry Sotero inadvertently published his guide to the NWO? You such a sad loser, Joe.
• Pastor JD Link: preacher or excaped mental patient...why not both?
• Tin foil shortage attributed to rise in Wisconsin Oath Keepers
• Prison Planet headline: "Poverty, Starvation and Sickness: Welcome to The New World Order!" Dude, that how it's always been on this damp little rock.
• Oliver North: wackjob felon fuck.
• PROOF OF THE ILLUMINATI! Or of crazy people. Take your pick.
• Mother Jones: Oil spill conspiracist (and reptillian shill) wins Republican primary.
• Finally a reason to watch C-Span: The Manchurian President (Come on! McCain was a FUCKING P.O.W. of communists, you unimaginative toilet goblin.)

And the Conspiracy of the Week a tie!:

Well, glaze my nipples and call me Susan: Blackwater is run by the Vatican and so contractors are essentially the modern Knights of Malta.

The second one is from Age of Autism, wherein Orac is a Big Pharma shill. Even if he was a shill, and he's not, it wouldn't have any effect on the outcome of all the studies that destroy the notion that vaccines cause autism. Pathetic, AoA. Fucking sad. How are you enjoying the pertussis epidemic, you monsters?

HJ