True story...

"Get the hell out!" I yelled. My father was on the other end of the phone.

"Yep. That's what everyone says when I tell them. It scared the hell out of the nurse who was with her."

"Who did you hear it from?"

"Dr. Hilarius, a very funny lady, and she tells a good story too."

"How did it happen?"

"Well, the woman who was in labor had a bit of _____, you know, so her eyes bugged out a little bit, like Barbara Bush."

"Her eyes bug out? I never noticed, but then again I can't look at her face directly."

"The patient was getting oxygen. The mask was over her face and it pulled down on her eyelid, and her eye popped out."

"That's foul."

"That's what I thought. So the nurse called the opthamologist on call, and he said it happens a lot. You just pop it back in. You can put some anesthetic drops on it first if it hurts."

"That's still so foul."

"They said that the woman caught it."

"Stop."

HJ (going to wear goggles from now on)