Supersizing my manhood

You know, I haven't done a Finding Jihad in a while, so when I found a file with a bunch of sex-spam title lines, I thought, well, I can't let that go to waste. It's short (not my manhood.)

• Don't be the laughing stock in the locker room (Clearly this was written by a girl, because I have never ever ever once ever seen people stand around a locker room and talk about how little someone's dick is. The other guys would be thinking suspiciously, "So, you were staring at his dick?"
• Give her unlimited pleasure (Jump off of a bridge!)
• Every girl dreams of a well hung man (His name is Tim.)
• When you're in her does it hurt? (Then you probably have gonorrhea!)
• She refuses to stop coming now (That's fine. I'll be asleep.)
• Wham Bham Thank you Ma'am (There is something about the mixture of illiteracy and politeness in that phrase that makes me very happy.)
• Supersize your manhood today (Would you like a hot apple pie with that?)
• Shoot your load over her creamy skin (Well, then you have clearly missed.)
• Shocking Scarlett Johansson home video (She is rehearsing her lines from Lost in Translation--Nude!)
• Outlast and outhit her (Um, you're talking about baseball, right?)
• with this, she's become a sex starved kitten (You should have her spayed.)
• 6 inches even when flaccid (But, really, what's the use of six inches of limp wang?)
• She went crazy when she saw my manhood ("I guess I shouldn't have
• She loves to suck now (She used to just suck, but now she has embraced her mediocrity.)
• Huge love luger is attainable (With only a 10-day waiting period!)
• Show her who the REAL man is. (It's Tim. He's over there.)
• Ever seen 10 inches of manhood (That is a Smurfy come-on line.)
• When she wants it bad (She gets it worse.)
• Better than a vibrator (It's a 12-inch Celestron reflector with auto-tracking, a PC link, and a CCD camera. Hey, everyone has their own kink.)
• Make sure that you made your woman happy tonight. (Sleep on a friends couch.)
• She said it felt like steel in her (Cold? Lifeless? Dead? Corpse-like?)
• Being 9 inches will never be easier (Unless you are born with 9 inches, in which case, there is an easier way.)
• Stiff,erect and rock hard (Uh, things that you say at Viagra convention...PASS! PASS!)

HJ